185. How do I start really loving myself?

The most important masterpiece you can create in life is yourself. Therefore to love yourself means developing your talents and abilities, mastering your body, mind and soul.

Loving yourself is not feeling sorry for yourself but smiling despite what is happening around you. Smile even when people humiliate you, smile even when you do not have money, smile when you feel tired.

The most important resource you have is your optimistic energy and the belief that everything will be good sooner or later.

Love is making yourself strong. Exercise your body, do not let it become weak. Eat what is good for your body.

Exercise your brain by focusing and concentrating on one idea at a time and constant education.

Strengthen your spirit by praying, meditating and repeating positive affirmations. We love most of our life in our heads, make it a good place to be.

Love yourself by taking the time and listening to your inner feelings. Answer simple questions:
What do you really want?
How do you really feel?
What is bothering you?
What makes you feel good?

Do not rush yourself. Do not step on yourself and respect your feelings.

Say “NO” when it serves you.

Say “YES” to a happy life fool of joy!

Have a loving attitude towards ALL humans. Respect differences and try to understand others the same way you try to understand yourself. You can do it simply by listening to others with good intentions and attitude.

Have a plan for a day, a week, a month, a year and 100 years. What legacy would you like to leave after you die? For example, in the course of my life I would like to write and publish ten books (I have already written and published five books), help ten thousand people to master their speech, plant ten thousand trees, create ten businesses (I already have three).

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176. Self-Motivation to raise your standards

Last Monday, on 8 January 2024 I went to my public speaking club Grosvenor Squire Toastmasters (TM). It is the oldest TM club in London. I love this club. However, I was somewhat disappointed by the quality of the speeches and speakers. The speeches were about trivia and delivered in bad English and in a boring way. Speakers talked about cycling, running, and driving. I am sorry but that was neither inspiring nor interesting. I found them rather shallow and lacking depth and meaning. I had a feeling that people did not make an effort in self-presentation and did not work enough to make their speeches more interesting. They just showed up and did them.

I vividly remember the first time I attended a meeting in this club in January 2004, twenty years ago. It was a different standard: eloquent speakers in elegant clothes, interesting speeches. I was learning a lot just by attending the meeting.

I cannot help noticing that with the introduction of smartphones, tablets, and endless types of social media and messengers, also as a result of COVID-19, people changed. The main change I see is many people suffer from informational obesity. They consume plenty of information and do little with it; that in turn makes them lazier and unmotivated to do anything. The performance standards are dropped. Many are fooled that life is happening on Instagram.

My question is: where will it all end? The lazier and the less motivated people are the poorer they will become.

Where do we go from here? How do we meet new challenges and get out of this situation smelling of roses? My answer is conscious living coupled with self-motivation.
Firstly, I want to share with you my actions about how I manage my resources and space:

  1. Become conscious of time
    I record the time I spend on messengers and social media and limit it to a maximum of one hour a day. I know people can spend the entire day in messengers.

  2. Become conscious about information consumption
    Instead of watching and reading I produce blogs and YouTube videos and prepare speeches. In other words, produce myself.

  3. Become conscious about money and your space
    Recently I bought a wonderful teapot for just £10 in a second-hand shop. I felt lucky as in Harrods it would cost £300. Instead of consuming I declutter and make more space. They say the more things you have the more time you spend managing them.

Secondly, how can we motivate ourselves to achieve prosperity and happiness and live to our full potential? Here is what I want to practice:

  1. Keeping high standards of self-presentation and self-image

  2. Being active physically outdoors

  3. Listening to music that makes me move and do something

  4. Communicating with high-energy people

  5. Write down a list of tasks for each day to achieve my weekly, monthly, and yearly goals. Develop the muscles of doing as opposed to passive consumption.

  6. Ask yourself: what is the meaning of my life? What do I contribute to this world? What is my legacy?

  7. Write a list of goals you want to achieve in the course of your life

  8. Ask yourself: what can make me a better human being?

I want to know how you motivate yourself.
Look forward to hearing from you

Yours
Olga Smith
www.batcsglobal.com

167. Self-Motivation

Advice #1
Fall in love!
Fall in love with another person! Psychologists suggest that we humans are run by our libido.
Fall in love with a country! Start learning a new foreign language in order to feel comfortable in this country.
Fall in love with yourself!

Advice #2
Make a list of things to do every day. Start with doing very simple things: make your bed, clean your shoes, etc. After you have done simple things praise and reward yourself with something nice. Have a beautiful “me” time.

Advice #3
Do a full health check-up and make sure your health is ok. If necessary see a psycho-therapist as you might be suffering from depression and a good doctor will give medicine that can help you increase your serotonin level for example.

Advice#4
Start doing sports outdoors on a regular basis. It can be a power walk, a run or a stretch. Look at the sun and receive sun energy.

Advice#5
Make a list of things that will happen to you if you do not do anything. Imagine this picture vividly.
After that make a long list of things that you like about this world and life in general and go on a sea holiday for 7 days.

Advice#6
Believe in yourself and that everything will be great. Pray!

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165. What should I not do for mental peace?

  1. Don’t allow negative thoughts to control your emotions
    Be mindful. As soon as a negative thought enters your mind change it for a positive one and believe that good things will happen to you.

  2. Don’t allow negative information in your brain
    Stop listening to the news (they are mostly negative and you have no control over changing them); avoid negative people and do not listen to them; avoid negativity on social media.

  3. Don’t compare yourself with others
    Nowadays people are victims of clever marketing that makes them think they are not good enough unless they have a perfect face, a perfect body, perfect teeth, hair, etc. We have models like Kim Kardashian who helps big businesses to sell these fake ideals. Just know that you are unique and that is very precious and beautiful in itself.

  4. Don’t just dream, think, or hope
    Act and make things happen. Educate yourself constantly and work all your life.

  5. Don’t rush yourself
    If you rush too much you get stress instead of peace.

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164. Be in control and exude authority

Good barristers, politicians and business leaders sound confident, in control and have authority in their speech and voice. Can it be mastered? Yes, and I will explain how.

First of all, in order to achieve authority in your voice be in control of your breathing. Good breath control will bring energy to your voice.

Secondly, good articulation will help you sound clear, more energised and powerful. You can master it with the apps ‎Get Rid of your Accent UK1 (British English) or ‎American Accent App (American English).‎

Thirdly, avoid sounding monotonous and saying everything on one level of pitch. Change the pitch, power and pace according to the emotion/meaning of a particular message. We can recommend the app 4Ps, Power, Pitch, Pace, Pause if you want to learn and practice this technique.

To achieve authority, speak in a straightforward way and stress the key messages. To make the keywords stand out use a louder or quieter voice (depending on the meaning). Raise the inflection when saying keywords and vice versa, use downward inflection with unstressed words. Learn more about inflecltion and sentence stress in the apps ‎Fluent English Speech (British English) or Fluent American Speech (American English).

Finally, think about physicality and be well in control of your posture and gestures. Have a good straight posture and gestures that support your messages.

What is the best way to practice it? Listen to speakers like Winston Churchill. Watch courtroom dramas and note how effective barristers speak. Here is a practical exercise for you:

  1. Read a speech out loud and record yourself.

  2. Underline stresses keywords and mark pauses in the printed copy of the speech. You can learn how to do it right with the app Power, Pitch, Pace, Pause.

  3. Read the speech again and record yourself. If necessary repeat this exercise a few times.

If you need help book a few elocution lessons.

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163. Impact of modern technology on our ability to communicate in person

I believe that since the introduction of smartphones and messengers like Whats Up, Viber, and others people prefer to text and send images rather than speak.

It has both advantages and disadvantages. The obvious advantage is speed and convenience. The disadvantages are that people lose the art of communicating in person and do not know how to enjoy it. They lose their confidence when they have to communicate in person. These people are at a disadvantage in moving forward in their careers. Successful salespeople, CEOs, MDs, and top Politicians must have amazing in-person communication skills.

To master communication in person I recommend:

  1. Learning to speak clearly

  2. Learning to communicate not only thoughts but also emotions and feelings

  3. Learning to use non-verbal messages, such as eye contact, posture and hand gestures to support your verbal messages

Many students who take our elocution lessons often tell us that they want to become confident communicators. Feeling confident is expressed by your body language, voice and words.

I recommend apps ‎Get Rid of your Accent UK1 and ‎Fluent English Speech (British English) or ‎American Accent App and ‎Fluent American Speech (American English), and Power, Pitch, Pace, Pause if you wnat to master your communication in person.

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157. How can I enhance communication skills and foster solid interpersonal connections?

Interpersonal connections may be based on:

  1. Business interests

  2. Personal interests

It proved quite tricky to combine the two, however, there are cases when business and personal interests work well together.

I have analysed my friends with fantastic interpersonal skills and they have two things in common: they are positive and have empathy.

Communication skills are mastered our entire lives. There is always room for improvement if we want to foster solid interpersonal connections.

There are common rules that can help you do that if you observe them.

  1. Develop a genuine and sincere interest in another person. Try to understand what they want. Look a little further and dig a little deeper. Often an overconfident pushy person is hiding insecurities and a shy introvert may turn out to be a tower of strengths. Pay attention to details as the truth usually leaks through tiny details.

  2. When interacting smile, people like that.

  3. Communicate clearly and take into account your interests and the interests of others to reach a win-win scenario.

  4. Be honest in a diplomatic way.

  5. Think long-term when it comes to building relationships.

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155. How can I become better at small talk?

Small talk has three main purposes:

  1. It helps to break the ice and create a friendly atmosphere

  2. It is a great opportunity to size up the other person

  3. It is an opportunity to showcase your personality and social status in a subtle way

What can be discussed during a small talk? I would suggest something general, positive and relevant to the situation you are in. The topics of small talk could be weather, holidays, school, university, places, sports, music, art, shopping, etc.

What topics should be avoided during small talk? Topics that are controversial and those that might embarrass, offend or make people feel uncomfortable. Definitely religion, politics, and very private/personal things. Avoid talking about wars, your political preferences, judging people from different religions and cultural backgrounds, your diseases and sex life.

To get better at small talk I recommend that you smile and connect to a person on an emotional level by being understanding and sympathetic This will help another person feel comfortable and safe.

Another thing you can do is adjust yourself to another person and create a rapport. For example, if you are a PhD in Quantum Physics and you talk to a builder may be the topic of your dissertation is not the best way to break the ice! What would work better when you talk to a person try to find some common ground sport for example. Or, if you see that the other person looks very sad your laughter and a smile would feel odd. Perhaps, a neutral expression would work better. Be sensitive to people’s needs and feelings.

I recommend not rushing your speech and allowing space for pauses to make the talk relaxed and pleasant. Do not interrupt the other person, instead listen with full attention and nod along when appropriate. Connect with what was said and continue by saying something to support the other person.

Avoid arguing, and try not to appear superior. Let the other person shine.

How can you showcase yourself during the small talk? First of all by the way you speak and listen. If you boast and interrupt others it can only show a lack of manners. If your speech is bare and primitive that might imply a lack of education. People will understand that you have been properly educated if you use a rich vocabulary.

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153. Active listening checklist

Empathetic listening or active involves listening not only to the content but also to how it is said. Nonverbal messages that a speaker is using can give you clues. The foundation of empathetic listening is a sincere interest in a person speaking.

The checklist of what not to do during active listening:

  1. Do not interrupt other’s speech

  2. Do not anticipate what will be said

  3. Do not finish a speaker's sentences

  4. Do not judge, observe what is being said and how it is being said

I recommend the following instructions if you want to master empathetic listening:

  1. Create eye contact with a speaker and look at them with empathy and a smile. People relax when you smile at them

  2. Observe the way a person speaks. Namely intonation, tone of voice, speech speed, loudness, etc. You can learn more about it in the book Get Rid of your Accent Part Two, Advance Level, and the apps Fluent English Speech and 4Ps, Power, Pitch, Pace, Pause

  3. Listen to the feelings and emotions behind words and voice, and respond to them appropriately

  4. Imagine that you are a psychotherapist who is talking to a patient and that you are paid for listening

  5. Allow a pause after what was said and connect with what was said

  6. Motivate yourself for active listening by knowing that a person who is listening is in a more powerful position than the one who speaks

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152. Learn to communicate your emotions and feelings

I have noticed that many of us were not educated to communicate emotions and feelings. Instead, we were taught "how to think right." In kindergarten, school, university and then at work, even in the family, we learned how to think and speak appropriately.

The thing is we are not robots; we are humans with feelings and emotions. In Western civilization, we learned how to neglect our feelings and just say "the right thing." We learned that expressing vulnerability is a weakness and that being tough is a real strength. Is it? I am not so sure about it.

We often communicate the feeling of frustration with anger and aggression. In England, where I live, it is very fashionable to express feelings in a passive-aggressive way. In other words, acting nicely but with hidden aggression. Is there a need to be aggressive or passive-aggressive? Is there a better way? How can we do it differently?

Where does the aggression come from? In my opinion, the basis of aggression is judgment. What often happens is we see that someone breaks "a rule" that we expected he/she should observe, and we are quick to judge and then may even attack that person. We evaluate, judge and attack.

What if we stop evaluating and simply observe? Instead of judging, we start observing other people's speech and observing our own reaction to it and what feelings and emotions we have at that moment. This process takes time. If we do this exercise on a regular basis it will become automatic. It will substitute our reactive/aggressive responses to communicating our observations in a calm, measured way. When communicating, it is much better if we look at the person with compassion rather than with judgment.

Observation is neutral, whilst judgment is negative. When we feel negative, our body reacts in a certain way: we get tense, become stiff, and shorten breathing. By pausing, relaxing your body and breathing correctly you will help yourself to communicate your emotions as observations.

Many students who take our elocution lessons often tell us that they want to become more confident. Feeling confident is expressed by your body language, voice and words. The key to confidence is calmness, feeling relaxed and at the same time in control of your emotions.

You can find useful breathing exercises and how you can use your intonation and voice to express different feelings and emotions in the book Get Rid of your Accent Part Two, Advanced Level and the apps Fluent English Speech and 4Ps, Power, Pitch, Pace, Pause.

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150. Annoying speech patterns

  1. Going round in circles
    It is so annoying when a person says something and then repeats it again and again. It is rather tiring when someone cannot stop expressing one idea and keeps repeating it endlessly. Such speech makes the speaker sound rather stupid.

  2. Beating about the bush
    I know people who can speak for a long time and not really say much. Such speech lacks concreteness and sounds lightweight. My friend calls such speakers “cappuccino people”. Such speech makes the speaker sound rather shallow.

  3. Monotonous speech
    Monotonous speech is so boring. As a result, listeners switch off very quickly. It also makes a speaker sound rather dull. The monotonous speech also lacks emotion and the speaker may sound like a robot. Actors learn how to modulate their voice in drama schools. You can master voice modulation with our book Get Rid of your Accent Part Two, Advance Level which is based on drama school training.

  4. Rushed speech
    The human brain absorbs information slower than someone transforms it which is why rushed speech is difficult to follow. During our elocution lessons, we teach our students how to slow down the pace of the speech and use pauses in order to make their speech easy and interesting to listen to.

  5. Paracite-words such as “eeeh”, “em”, “like”, “basically”, “you know”, “so”, etc.
    People often use parasite words to connect sentences and speak in paragraphs. When the speaker does not make pauses between sentences and speaks in paragraphs listeners cannot concentrate after the first idea and switch off. The full stop was invented to separate sentences and ideas. The pause between them allows listeners to absorb one idea at a time and get ready for the next one. You can practise this with our book Get Rid of your Accent Part Two, Advance Level.

  6. Wooly speech that lacks clarity
    Such speech creates a considerable disadvantage for both the speaker and the listener. The speaker is perceived as uneducated and lacking confidence and the listener is frustrated as he/she cannot understand what is said. To overcome wooly speech start articulation exercises with our bestselling book Get Rid of your Accent Part One .

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149. Non-verbal communication

Nonverbal messages are far more powerful than verbal and paying attention to details is the key when creating one’s image/brand as well as understanding other people.

Eye contact and facial expressions are very powerful tools for non-verbal communication. You can express happiness, sadness, confidence, fear, surprise, and a full range of emotions with your eyes, lips, and mouth.

Your posture and the way your walk speaks louder than words. People with good posture look powerful, graceful and confident. Bad posture is associated with old age and a low spirit.
In our book Get Rid of your Accent Part Two we talk about posture preparation as part of working on your voice power.

Gestures are an important part of non-verbal communication. Lack of gestures may be seen as stiffness of the body and show a lack of confidence. Scratching your head or any part of the body can look a bit simple and demonstrate a lack of upbringing. Touching and trying to improve your hair may show that you are not sure of your looks and feel you are not enough. Too many gestures and repetitive gestures may imply that you are trying too hard to compensate for a lack of confidence.

People can learn to use gestures to their advantage. Empathic gestures such as nodding your head show that you hear another person and understand them. This also can be added with the appropriate tone of voice and intonation. You can master it with the book Get Rid of your Accent Part Two, Advance Level.

Finally, clothes, shoes, hair, nails, jewelry and makeup are also part of non-verbal communication. When clothes look clean, expensive and tastefully put together they communicate wealth, culture and status, whilst dirty, smelly clothes with holes reveal the opposite picture.

It is vital that verbal messages and properly supported and enhanced by nonverbal clues to create a credible presence and powerful messages.

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147. What should I do to improve my listening skills fast?

I recommend the following daily practices:

  1. Make an effort to not interrupt a person speaking. Often, when we talk to others, we do not have the patience to listen. We hear a few words and very quickly we start anticipating what the other person will say. We even try to finish their sentences which is not very helpful, particularly for the person who is talking

  2. Pay attention to people and understand who you are speaking to. Try to answer the following questions. What do they want? What is bothering them?

  3. Pay attention to people’s intonation and voice. Is it sad or happy? Does the person sound confident or hesitant?

  4. Avoid commenting, judging or advising regarding what you listening about.

  5. Listen and engage your mind and heart

  6. Reduce your speaking time.

    I noticed that if one has a tendency to talk a lot it takes quite an effort to control this urge. It will take time, effort and mastery to possess the art of keeping silent and saying less than necessary.

I practice simple techniques to overcome my urge to talk a lot:

  1. When planning a day I make a written note that programs me to reduce my speaking time by 80%

  2. I make an effort to engage in active listening

  3. I wear a bracelet that reminds me that I should control my urge to speak a lot

  4. Instead of speaking, I use eye contact and other body language signs to interact with others, I let others speak more

  5. I speak only when it is absolutely necessary and I try to keep silent otherwise.

  6. Before saying anything I ask myself: is it necessary? how it can be interpreted? what are the dangers and consequences of my words?

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146. How can developing your communication skills lead to financial opportunities?

The primary purpose of communication is to understand others and be understood. There are additional purposes as well such as informing, persuading, selling, introducing yourself to others, inspiring, entertaining, etc.
There are different situations where communication is a key tool.
People who take our elocution lessons prepare for their job interviews, presenting to potential investors, court performances (as barristers), negotiations, teaching, etc. I have noticed one thing in common among our students: they are all high achievers who need good communication skills.

People who buy our books and apps and take our elocution lessons and course tell us their reasons why they need good communication skills. Here are just a few.

  1. They lack confidence when presenting

  2. They feel that their colleagues do not always understand what they are saying and it can be disruptive and even frustrating at work.

  3. They are not invited to meetings and they cannot chair projects because of difficult-to-understand speech

  4. They are not getting promoted and as a result, do not have a pay rise

  5. They cannot get higher-paid jobs where they need to present, chair meetings and discussions

After our elocution lessons and practising with our books and apps their speech and life changed for the better:

  1. They feel confident when speaking and become successful at work

  2. They get better jobs and their salary increases

  3. They enjoy their work more including chairing meetings, presenting and speaking in public

To date, we have five books and nine iOS and nine Android apps plus two video courses for speech mastery. If you master your communication skills you will be able to get jobs, build successful business relations and grow your business.

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144. Effective ways to improve communication in a romantic relationship

Romantic relationships differ from business and friend relationships. Business relationships are based on making a business successful. Friendship is based on respect and mutual interests. Romantic relationships are based on attraction and feelings.

Quite often, when the spark is gone a romance transforms into a friendship. I heard that after a few years, husbands love their wives as sisters. The romance is gone and they are looking for other options because feeling romantic is beautiful.

I will express my opinion which is based on my experience and the life stories I witnessed myself. I will start with rules and follow how you communicate these rules in your romantic relationships.

Rule #1

The real attraction happens when we are authentic. The moment you try for others to like you and change yourself you immediately lose. In order to stay attractive be yourself. Avoid changing yourself to just please others.

Rule #2

Respect your space and do not allow even the loved ones too close. That is not to say being cold. It is about keeping certain things just to yourself. Do not be an open book.

Rule#3

Respect your time and do not allow others to steal it from you, even your loved ones. Your time is the most valuable resource you have.

Rule #4

Be independent and have a mission, work and hobby. Do not dilute yourself in the romance.

Rule #5

Work on your allure. Be erotic.

Practical recommendations

In romantic relationships body language plays the main role. I will start with how to communicate in an erotic, alluring way. The key is eye contact. Look at your romantic partner with desire. Do not shy away, do not look elsewhere, and keep eye contact with your man/woman. The expression in your eyes will be louder than words.

Touch your partner with love, care and passion. Many people claim they are not touchy-feely. Well, this is not helpful in a romance. Touch can be so much more powerful than words.

You can also communicate with your choice of clothes and perfume, the way you walk and the way you move your body. Move slowly, and have open body language and a beautiful smile.

In romantic communication the way you say it outweighs what you say. Normally, I would suggest a slow pace, not too loud a voice and not too many words.

However, there can be situations in romantic relationships when you can feel angry. I say we should not be afraid to show our true feelings. I think shouting is perfectly normal. As long as it can end in a romantic way.

Avoid talking too much about trivial things, and your health problems. Watch an erotic film, or go to a gallery or theatre instead. Avoid looking scruffy. Do not groom yourself in front of your partner. Look and smell nice, always ready to be intimate. Avoid over-planning. Be spontaneous.

The biggest enemy of a romantic relationship is being too much in your head, overthinking, analysing, expecting and predicting.

Instead, switch off your brain and go into your feelings and sensations; smell, hear, taste and look and enjoy them to the full.

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143. Why leaders should talk less and listen more

One of the most important tasks of a leader is to make decisions. To make good decisions leaders need information from others. The more silent they are, the more they are able to hear. Active listening without interrupting will enable leaders to notice finer details, particularly if they pay attention to the intonation and voice. They will also be able to notice nonverbal or body language signals, gather valuable information and have a bigger picture of a situation. That will be useful for making better decisions.

The second task of a leader is to lead people of different abilities, identify their strengths and use these strengths successfully. Active listening does help understand people better.

Finally, not giving away too much and being economical with words is a very useful tool in establishing a powerful position, particularly in negotiation, business meetings with rivals, etc. “The person who cannot control his words shows he cannot control himself and therefore unworthy of respect” (Don Corleone, Godfather). If one wants to assume a position of power he/she should always say less than necessary.

According to R. Greene, “The game of power is in many ways the game of appearances. When you say less than necessary you inevitably appear more powerful than you are which is the key to establishing the aura of power”. How does saying less than necessary gives you an advantage? R. Greene suggests that “your silence will make other people uncomfortable. Humans are machines of interpretation and explanation, they have to know what you are thinking. When you carefully control what you reveal people cannot pierce your intentions or your meaning”.

Remember, if you are in a leading position, your words are extremely powerful and every word counts. Once the words are out you cannot take them back. They can be used for you or against you. Your brief answers and silence will put people on the defensive and they will be trying to fill the gaps you left with all sorts of comments that might reveal valuable information about them and their weaknesses. Moreover, when people try to share as much information as possible they often say things that are not appropriate for the context and may appear silly as a result.

I personally have noticed that keeping silent is hard and in order to make myself comfortable I may start making small talk and if the other person is not saying much I feel weak, I try to talk more and say things I do not really need to say. In this situation, I make myself desperate for approval. I feel like people who use silence with me rob me of my power.

I noticed that if one tends to talk a lot it takes quite an effort to control this urge. It will take time, effort and mastery to possess the art of keeping silent and saying less than necessary.

I practice simple techniques to overcome my urge to talk a lot:

  1. When planning a day I make a written note that programs me to reduce my speaking time by 80%

  2. I make an effort to engage in active listening

  3. I wear a bracelet that reminds me that I should control my urge to speak a lot

  4. Instead of speaking, I use eye contact and other body language signs to interact with others, I let others speak more

  5. I speak only when it is absolutely necessary and I try to keep silent otherwise.

  6. Before saying anything I ask myself: is it necessary? how it can be interpreted? what are the dangers and consequences of my words?

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142. What are some tips for improving public speaking and presentation skills?

In my opinion, the qualities that are important for a public speaker and presenter are :

1. Good straight posture which creates a confident image

2. Great eye contact which the audience

3. Good articulation and clear speech

4. Good voice projection so that people could hear him/her

5. Ability to explain his/her topic in an accessible simple way so that people with different abilities can understand it

6. Ability to structure the speech and prioritise the important points to fit the set time

7. Ability to ask questions that encourage audience to interact with the speaker

I would like to give the following recommendations for a public speaker and presenter:

1. Avoid parasite words, swear words, and fillers like “so, you know, basically, like, em, ah”. People use these words when they are thinking and speaking at the same time. Simply substitute these unnecessary words with pauses

2. Use pauses to separate your ideas, do not say all of them in one breath and allow your students to digest one idea at a time. If you speak without pauses, your student

3. Speak about profound things using simple language

4. Get to the point. Avoid beating about the bush

5. Do not jump from one topic to another, use logic and finish one thought at a time.

6. Ask questions and let students do the talking

7. Download apps, books and video courses to master your speech and public speaking skills

iOS Apps: (the same apps are available on Google Play)

1. ‎Get Rid of your Accent UK1 and Fluent English Speech (British English)‎

2. American Accent App and Fluent American Speech (General American English)‎

3. ‎‎Business English Speech‎

4. Power, Pitch, Pace, Pause

5 Paperback, Kindle and Audio books to master English:

1. Get Rid of Your Accent: The English Pronunciation and Speech Training Manual

2. Advanced Level (Pt. 2) (Get Rid of Your Accent: The English Speech Training Manual)

3. Get Rid of Your Accent for Business: The English Pronunciation and Speech

4. GET RID OF YOUR ACCENT, PART ONE AND TWO: GENERAL AMERICAN SPEECH TRAINING MANUAL, Second Edition

2 Video Courses to master English speech:

Get Rid of your Accent Part One and Get Rid of your Accent Part Two

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141. How can you improve your negotiation skills?

Here is advice from my personal experience which might help you to master your negotiation skills.

  1. Setting clear goals you want to achieve as a result of a negotiation and writing down your strategy for achieving them.

  2. Projecting power, leadership and credible image. Avoid sounding greedy, be honest and straight. Be in control of your urges to talk too much.

  3. Active listening and tuning into your negotiation partner, paying attention to the intonation and voice; understanding their needs and aspirations. This is different from passive listening where you hear the speaker but fail to retain the information. The more silent you are the more you are able to hear.

  4. Communicating clearly and to the point to keep your audience’s attention. This skill is particularly important when speaking on the phone. You can achieve this skill by performing speech exercises with the apps ‎Get Rid of your Accent UK1 and Fluent English Speech.

  5. Thinking bigger. Often, when negotiating, each party is striving to get the biggest “slice of the pie” possible. If one party gets more then the other will get less. To break free of this traditional idea of negotiation, experts suggest shifting your goals from growing your slice to growing the whole pie. In this case, each party can get more than expected. Moreover, it will create the grounds for establishing rapport and trust for future business deals and collaborations. based on a win-win scenario

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140. Can speaking positively help someone develop a positive mindset?

The short answer is yes, it will help. The most important factor in creating a positive mindset is working on fostering a positive attitude. A positive attitude then is supported by using positive vocabulary.

Let me explain how it works. When you speak you program yourself and a positive talk will create not only a positive mindset but also positive events in your life.

By talking positively your focus will be on positive things thus you will magnify good things and create your own positive reality.

There are several realities that take place at the same time starting from the most negative like war, death, fear, and to the most positive like feeling optimistic, falling in love and enjoying peace.

One person who tends to talk about negative things and use negative language might find him/herself feeling sad, fearful and at a low energy level.

Another person who is optimistic and who wants to discuss successes and victories, beauty and prosperity will be at a high energy level which will be instrumental in bringing great things into his/her life.

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